Ugh, I hate the way this shirt fits me!

Mmmmm, no, these pants are NOT flattering at all.

If my body was different, than I could wear all the fun new fashions.

I hate the way my {insert body part} looks today! 

Sound familiar? This is an inner dialogue that many women (and men too) go through as they cycle through body shaming phases. Body shame is a hater. There is no amount of spanx or yoga pants or makeup or fashion attire that can make us appreciate our bodies more. 

I know this because my shame game has been played hard throughout the years. As a former 4 season athlete, I never took the time to appreciate what I had (or how I got it); I just always pushed for more, for better, for something other than what I had. Fast forward to the present and my body has majorly changed! Post 3 kids and a very different lifestyle, I’ve come to a place of gentle acceptance about my body transformation. But this didn’t come easily! I still daily do the work of not shaming myself and instead appreciate what my body CAN do. Part of this appreciation came from understanding my unique body, and part of it came from a place of heartbreak for the young girl me that didn’t appreciate what she had, when she had it!

I’ve never been to Vegas and I’ve never gambled, but, I’d bet money that you probably struggle with a similar shame game. Here are some things I’ve learned over the years to dismantle the daily hate rhetoric:


1.Put your hands on your body.

Yes, that’s right, touch your body. Often times, we are sooo out of practice with giving loving intention to our body. A simple, yet effective method for combating this is, when you’re changing your clothes, vigorously rub your hands together to create some warmth and place them on the body where you feel disgruntled about it’s appearance. Use the warmth from your hands to imagine love being sent into this spot and breathe deeply. No judgments, no shame, just lovingly touch the parts that bring you shame. Offer thanks for what it can do. If you don’t know what that part of the body does, find out, because the more you understand, the more you can change your perspective. This simple ritual starts to rewrite the energy in these areas and create new brain body connections that are associated with love instead of shame. 

2. Make your body move to show you what it’s capable of.

Uh huh, that’s right, get yourself moving! Our bodies were not created to sit and binge on Netflix all day or to sit in our cubicles for 8 hours at a time or commute several hours in a car or play on our phones. The body is meant to have action and movement. This doesn’t have to be strenuous or complicated. It doesn’t even require a gym membership.

It only requires good sneakers and you. Go outside and walk for 60 minutes every day and notice two weeks after, the changes in your body. They might be subtle; like feeling a little more sure footed. The changes might feel big; like sleeping more soundly at night. It might be hard at first. Hard is ok. Whatever way you can get your movement in, your body will respond in gratitude and you will probably start appreciating the energy increase, the more positive mindset, the strength of your legs, the ease with which you can breathe, perhaps even the way your clothes fit differently. This one thing can bring deep gratitude for the body without having to do much extra at all.

3.Listen to what your body is telling you.

Everything communicates; from the trees underground, to the bees in the colonies to the systems in your body. We used to know how to listen to the body and understand it’s language. When we started giving that power over to others to tell us about our body, we lost the ability to know what our unique body is communicating.

For instance, take flatulence, otherwise known to my 6 & 8 year old boys as farts {insert uncontrolled giggling here from them!} Gas in the body has a way of communicating. Loud, boisterous gas that doesn’t contain any stinky smell is a sign that the body might not be breaking down carbohydrates (also known as sugars,) easily. Stinky, hot, foul gas is a message that the digestive system is not breaking down proteins well enough and might need some help. These are just two small examples of how the body communicates. There are many more ways and some might be unique to you.

If you’re curious about learning the language of your body, start a body journal for a month where you write down gassy moments after certain meals, aches and pains during stressful or emotionally draining times, sleepiness during certain hours of the day, heartburn, cravings, really anything at all that you notice! After a month, look back and look for any reoccurring patterns, this can start to help you understand where to start on your journey of listening to the body. If this feels overwhelming, ask me for help!

These three subtle yet meaningful tips can help you move in the direction of loving your body again. We only have one body in this life, why not work with it, instead of against it? Remember, the goal here is ease over effort and ultimately moving you into a place of gratitude for your amazing body. 

Want support while you start undoing the body shame game? Book a free 30 minute health discovery session with me. Find out how I can support you with your health

Giant Hugs,